Happy birthday, Dad.

Dad would have been 65 today. The first day of Summer. The longest day of the year (sure felt long today!).

Tonight our family met together and reminisced. We miss him dearly but we also rejoiced in all he left with us. There was more laughter than I thought there would be. I'm glad we didn't sing Happy Birthday because I'm certain we would have made a scene and not made it through the song, especially not the four we usually sing.

We worked with Dad.
We learned from Dad.
We laughed with/at Dad (especially those corny jokes).
We served with Dad.
We dreamed with Dad.
We shared with Dad.
Did I mention we worked with Dad?

But most importantly...
We learned how to love from Mom and Dad.
What great examples they are.

You are missed, Dad. More than words can express.

My Wonderful Dad. By, Shelley Raynes

My Wonderful Dad,
he is our hero and a great man in our lives who loves us and wants us to be happy in what we do and he is so proud of all of us and he knows that we will take go care of mom .
we all do miss our father and our hero and friend .
By, Shelley Raynes

The Teacher

Never rich—well not in the ways of the world—he was rich with words. He could mold them and weave a story that would captivate and teach at the same time. You would walk away never knowing that you had learned a lesson you would use later in life.

I find myself often starting a story with, “Well, my Dad once told me…” A kind friend said I should write the stories down—so I do, and I will. This story is rather simple, but it’s a story of redemption; of love; of looking to Christ.

A young boy full of angst is sent out of the classroom for disruptive behavior. He lay on the floor outside the classroom counting the tiles on the ceiling and wishing he was somewhere else. Anywhere else. The class breaks for lunch and his classmates run all around him, but he still lies there, unmoved. Out of the corner of his eye he sees his teacher. He braces himself for another lecture but instead he is greeted with warm hands cupping his face and a heartfelt smile. She looks into his eyes and sees in them his true potential. She said one simple phrase that forever changed his life, “Joe, you are better than this.”

And he believed it.

He would become a teacher to thousands of would-be teachers. His love for children and their pure innocence would guide his discourses. They all shared the similar refrain. “Be kind to them, be gentle. For they need to know you see their true potential”.

He was always a teacher to his children. His lectures and stories would all have the same theme, “Look to Christ and live. He knows your true potential. He knows who you are and what you can become. You are better and more amazing than anything you can imagine. You are better than this”.

His children re-tell his stories because we believe it, too.

Joseph Raynes Funeral Information

Thank you everyone for your amazing outpouring of love and support. We have truly felt buoyed by all of your prayers and love.

Here is the information for Dad's funeral:
Public viewings will be held on Friday, January 14, 2011, at Walker Sanderson Funeral Home (646 E 800 N, Orem) from 6-8pm; and on Saturday, January 15, at the Orem Utah Cascade Stake Center (481 E Center St, Orem) from 11am-12:30pm.

Funeral services will be held on Saturday, January 15, at the Orem Utah Cascade Stake Center (481 E Center St, Orem) starting at 1pm.

Interment will be at the Orem City Cemetery (1520 N 800 E) directly following the service.

Click here for the Deseret News obituary.
Click here for the Daily Herald obituary.

Beloved Husband, Father, Son, Brother.

Joseph Lincoln Raynes PhD, age 64, passed away peacefully January 10, 2010, surrounded by his eternal family, after a battle with brain cancer.

He was born June 21, 1946, in Provo, Utah to Beth Milner and Lincoln Frances Raynes; he was the second of eight children. Much of his childhood was spent on the Oregon Coast. While at BYU, Joe met his beautiful wife Alice Nielsen in a laundromat and it was love at first sight. Their first conversation began with his joke about both having red hair. They married in the Salt Lake Temple on May 27, 1969. They have ten children, all redheaded. It was impossible to be around Joe and not know he loved his family, the Gospel, and serving others.

Joseph completed his Bachelors and Masters degrees at BYU and earned his PhD at Texas A&M University. He served and inspired others throughout his lifelong career in Education. He was an Elementary School Teacher, Principal at Joaquin Elementary, Dean of Continuing Education, Dean of Trades and Technology, and Associate Academic Vice President at Utah Valley State College. He was instrumental in bringing the Education Program to the now Utah Valley University. He loved being a Professor of Education. His influence is carried through the countless teachers he molded.

Traveling the world extensively, Joe was always in search of opportunities to serve others. Fluent in both Portuguese and Spanish, he lived in Bolivia and traveled throughout South America with his young family while working with the Bolivian government. He lived in Colonia Juarez, Mexico working with the Juarez Stake Academy, and traveled to Mongolia to develop their higher education programs during their transition from Communism. He was a gifted storyteller who weaved his life experiences into tales that both entertained and edified.

He was a dedicated servant of the Lord, who served an honorable LDS mission in the Brazil North Mission. He labored as Branch President at the MTC, Bishop of Cascade 2nd Ward, High Council Member in Orem Cascade Stake, Ordinance Worker in the Mount Timpanogos Temple, and a member of the Curriculum Resource Committee. A gifted teacher of life and salvation, he lived to bring action to the Gospel’s precepts.

Joe was a builder of homes, ideas, and lives. A gentle giant, who was steadfast, thoughtful, humble, and strong; he spent his life in quiet service. His greatness was shown by his Christ-like love, the warmth of his smile, the power of his patience, the richness of his intelligence, his ability and desire to teach even the hardest of hearts, his comedic timing, and his gift to uplift others through his faith, stories, and unconditional love. His love of the Savior showed in everything he did.

He is survived by his loving wife of 41 years, Alice Nielsen Raynes, and their ten children: Janelle (Nathan) Gerber, Michelle, Denise (Paul) Pitcher, Alison (Marshall) Smith, Melanee, Stefanie (Nate) Farnsworth, Jonathan (Daniela), Danielle (Bryan) Kennedy, Derrick (Alexa), David (Sydney), and their 17 grandchildren. He is also survived by his father and five sisters.

We will post details for the viewing and the funeral soon.

Update

Hello family and friends.

Joe had an MRI last week and from the growth of the tumors (treatment didn't impact their growth, sadly), the doctors have given a guesstimate of a month or two left until the cancer takes him. He has begun home hospice care. His pain is acute and constant so we are doing our best to manage that pain with medication.

We are allowing visitors by appointment only. The visits are short and have the potential of being canceled at any time, based on how he is feeling. If you would like to visit, please contact Melanee Raynes.

We still ask that you do not ring the doorbell or drop in so we can manage things for his comfort.

Our hearts are touched by the outpouring of love, concern and support from all of you. Just as my dad was a great example to me of Christ's love, you all are exemplifying Christ's love in your actions, prayers and thoughts for us. We thank you.

Love to you all.

Rehab

Dad has been in rehab for almost two weeks now. He is still sleeping a lot and quite tired when not sleeping. We hope to bring him home this week but nothing is set in stone. We will not be able to accept visitors at the house when we bring him home.

We have received many kind cards and notes, thank you. Also, thank you for your prayers, we're sure they're helping him and my mom through this process.

Post Cranny

The nurses call brain surgeries "crannies" or "cranny" in the singular form. Dad had his fifth today and everything went well. They placed 11 chemo wafers in the tumor cavity and those should last around 6 weeks. We hope this chemo works better than the last. Dad is luckily back in his room and not in ICU. He has been in some pain, which is expected with surgery, and sleeps a lot. We're glad he sleeps, he's recovering well. We hope to bring him home soon.

Thank you all for your prayers.

Dad Update: Emergency Surgery

Dad had another headache that would not go away, so he went in for a scan. They found some bleeding in his brain, and another tumor, so they set him up for emergency surgery. The surgery went well and he is now resting in the ICU. Miracles are happening again! They said that he would lose vision in his left eye and motor function on his left side, but only hours after surgery, he had not lost any of his eye sight or his motor functioning!

I got an email from Danielle explaining his recovery. I'll post it here and you can here it from her!

"Here is the latest update on Dad. This morning he was looking so much better than yesterday! His swelling has gone down dramatically, even though there is still some. They are still draining fluid, and that could be for a little while longer. The doctors came in and took out one of the pumps, and let him sit up and eat solid foods. He also got up and walked around a bit! The best news though, is that he hasn't lost any of his vision in his left eye like they told us he would, and even though his left side of his body is a little weaker than the right, he has full function!! So he is mending!!

The doctors told us that we are figuring out what is going on with his blood first before we make any other plans for the cancer treatments. The plan is to have him heal up from his surgeries and then we'll figure out the next steps. But remember, he is doing much better than the doctors were expecting!

He was also unblinded from the study. He found out that he was taking the placebo, not the Avastin which could be a blessing itself because the Avastin can cause bleeding so it might have made all this even worse. We are seeing miracles and good things happening so keep up all that praying! It's working!!

Love to all,
Dani"

Dad Update!

Dad and Mom went on an awesome trip the last week of July funded by an anonymous donor. If you’re reading this, Mr. Anonymous, THANK YOU! They had the best time. They came out to visit ME in Florida! It felt like Christmas having them here all to myself. They also went on a cruise and had an amazing time. They said they didn’t even think about the cancer the whole time they were on the ship, they just relaxed and enjoyed their time together.

On August 3rd, Dad started radiation and Temodar (chemo). He goes to radiation 5 times a week Monday-Friday, and as I type this he only has two weeks left! He also takes his chemo medicine everyday. As their insurance is not paying for the chemo, we thought they would have to pay out-of-pocket the 10,000 a month price tag, but the Commitment To Care Foundation, thanks to many prayers, is providing the chemo free of charge. We are SO GRATEFUL. It is truly a miracle.

The radiation makes Dad tired, but he is starting to feel better as he gets off the Decadron. The Decadron also gave him some diabetes issues, but he will hopefully get off insulin soon. He is also starting to lose his hair, but he looks cool bald. The doctor found some blood clots in his legs, so he also now gets two injections a day for that. My dad, the walking pin-cushion.

Good news! Dad starts the study on September 8th. The study is an experimental drug that has shown amazing results. It is a miracle that he got into it and we are so happy! He will get a 90-minute infusion the first day, then in 2 weeks, a 60-minute infusion, then in two weeks a 30-minutes infusion. If he handles those well, he will continue on the 30-minute.

All in all, Dad is doing well. He is the toughest man alive. Please keep him in your prayers. He is so grateful for all the prayers and help so far. Thank you!

Play time

Mom and Dad are playing this week. A long-deserved, long-delayed period of play.

First, fun with kiddos in Florida.

Second, fun on a cruise ship.

Third, fun at Disneyworld with kiddos.

Fourth, fun at the hospital to get chemo. Wait, that's fun? Oh, oops.

But...if you know my dad, somehow he will make chemo something he can crack a joke about, find some silver lining to, teach a lesson from.

Hello all followers, friends and family. We have an adventure ahead of us, as Dad called it, and know you all are wanting to be along for the ride. There was great advice given today from good friends of Alice and Joe, the Dennings. Kyle has just been through these same experiences and suggested keeping a blog. There are many contributors to this family blog, so many different voices and experiences will be heard. We hope most of all to chronicle the feelings, the blessings and the miracles which we, as a family, have faith will happen.

Family Meeting Notes for August

First, thank you to all siblings willing to participate in the resurrection of our family meeting. We really need to work together to make it a quick, productive and less chatty meeting. We are very social and we love each other dearly, but fighting through the conversations is frustrating. I suggest we come prepared to relate any and all activities that are relevant to our family. This should be done with only one person speaking and just make it a quick calendaring event. After that, if there are events, etc., that need "planning" we can concentrate on that, excusing those not interested to converse in another room :) I hope my taking this head-on doesn't offend, but, like I said, I was tired of always being out of the loop and it shouldn't be all Mom's responsibility. And that leads to...

Second, here is the recap and dates for things we talked about on Sunday. Pull out those blackberrys (ies?) and calendars and write these down.

(July 31: Gerber kids at Grandma's in afternoon and for dinner)For Mom's calendar :)

August 2: Jackson's Blessing @ 11:00 am at Smith's church in Provo. Lunch directly after Sacrament Meeting at Smith's house. Driving instructions and any food assignments will be sent via email from Alison to ya' all.

August 6: Bridal Shower for Grandma, Barbara, ?? whatever we are calling her at 7:00 PM at Eagle Summit Park in Lehi, Utah. (These following items are also more complete on The Missing Linc blog.) This event is actually for the whole family. Come with husband and kids and maybe a dessert to share.

August 7: Temple session with Grandpa (and others) at Mt. Timp Temple. We are doing the 4:00 session so be in the chapel by 3:30. Any babysitting needs can be directed to my kids.

Also that night, family dinner at Mom and Dad's after session - 6:30 ish?

August 8: Wedding day! All kids and "assigned" babysitters be at the Gerber's by 2:00 to drop off and give instructions. Be at the temple by 2:30. Pictures will be after the ceremony. We decided NOT to hassle with kids at the temple pictures, so babysitters, plan on at least 2 hours.

Reception at Raynes' from 5:00 to 8:00. I know we will all be very helpful wherever we are needed.

August 18: Irrigation @ 3:00 pm. Dinner and Starting school get-together? Any excuse to get together, ain't that great!! (Shut up!)

August 23: Temple Dedication, babysitting available by Bryan and Dani at Grandma's. Just let them know which session. Dinner at regular time.

August 27: Starting the Nielsen Family Reunion at 5:30pm. We are splitting kids between Mom's (young children and middle children) and Stefanie's (teens and those who act like them). What? No place for adults and those that act like them? No, not you YET David :)

August 28: Activities start at Wines Park in Lehi. We will be there for a few hours and eat lunch. Move to the Lehi Pool until 4:00 or whenever you have had it. We will end up at Cascade Park for water games and inflatable fun and dinner. Done around 8:00 or 9:00. We are planning on the whole day, so block it out NOW because Mom will need our help.

August 29: Family dinner at 2:30 at Mom's. This is the Whole Nielsen family and the end of our reunion. See, not too painful!

That's all folks! Thanks and keep tabs on this blog as this is where we will update things. Love to all.

For anyone who wasn't informed, I apologize. I'm engaged! I'm not sorry I'm engaged, I'm sorry I didn't get to talk to you. Well that's the update, another Raynes!

Happy Anniversary!!

Today is Joe and Alice Raynes' 40 year anniversary. They really don't look like they could be old enough :)

Wanted to wish you the best, we love you.

Here are some pictures of that day and of receptions shortly after.

I do believe Alice loves these guys...the picture says it all!


I just want to publicly thank the Gerbers for spending their Spring Break steam cleaning practically my WHOLE HOUSE! It was such an amazing act of service...thanks soooo much guys!! Love you!!

I would also like to thank all the offers of babysitting I have gotten from my fabulous sisters and brothers. I WILL take you up on it, so be ready...Scarlet could come any day now!! Alice is super easy to take care of...she just needs her binkie, dora, and some chocolate milk and she is a HAPPY camper.

Selling my house

I am listing my house on the 16th. Please, if you don't mind, keep it in your prayers that it will sell fast and for a good amount. Thanks in advance. :)

Nielsen Family Reunion

I was talking to Lillian last week and she mentioned that she and mom (Alice) are in charge of a Nielsen Family Reunion this summer. She asked if I had any ideas. I thought we could all check into specific things that our individual cities offer for groups or reunions and give Mom and Lillian some ideas. For example, we could reserve our pool here in Pleasant Grove for a couple of hours one evening. There are parks, pools and other things I haven't even thought of. I know it is early in the year, but probably not too early to reserve some things for this summer. Let's post some ideas and really help shape what we would like to do.

Thanks all!!

Gonna Be a Bear

In this life I am a woman. In my next life, I'd like to come back as a bear.

When you're a bear, you get to hibernate. You do nothing but sleep for six months. I could deal with that.

Before you hibernate, you're supposed to eat yourself stupid. I could deal with that too.

When you're a girl bear, you birth your children (who are only 1/2 pound) while you're sleeping and wake up to partially grown, cute cuddly cubs. I could definitely deal with that.

If you're a mama bear, everyone knows you mean business. You swat anyone who bothers your cubs. If your cubs get out of line, you swat them too. I could deal with that.

If you're a bear, your mate expects you to wake up growling. He expects that you will have hairy legs and excess body fat.

Yup.

Gonna be a bear!

Hi Everyone,
I just got back from the doctor and Alice has the Croup with symptoms of RSV. Just thought I 'd let you all know in case your kids start showing the same symptoms. She had a fever of above 103, and trouble breathing. Dr. Cornish said that this Croup has been turning into RSV a couple days later.

So, if your kid has a wheezing sound when they breathe in, along with a fever, I would probably go to the Doctor to get some steroids.

Also, he told me that if the fever stays for longer than 5 days, or if it goes away and comes back with a mucus-y sounding breath, then she has RSV. So, those are they symptoms to watch out for.

Just an FYI...Love ya!